Creating a Tinder profile shouldn’t really be that difficult. It’s just a few photos here and a little introduction there, right?
Well, I beg to differ. Apart from deciding on the right photos, I find writing a Tinder bio to be extremely difficult. Let me share this story that illustrates my ongoing struggle when it comes to this matter.
Getting started with the perfect profile.
One Saturday evening, a friend and I were housesitting. We were enjoying some wine and snacks in front of the TV and I was busy optimising my Tinder profile. I’d already spent the afternoon curating photos I felt represented who I am, taking great care to showcase both my best photos and some natural photos. I wanted to create a good (and fair) first impression.
I figured my profile should give people a clear portrayal of who I am and how I like to live my life. I wanted my profile to impress and attract all the potential partners out there. However, two hours and three existential crises later, I had given up and decided to go to bed.
While I was busy struggling…
While I was busy breaking my brain in the process of creating a perfect profile, my friend had decided to join in on the fun. In less time than it takes to drink half a glass of wine, she had created her profile and started matching with people.
She didn’t even write a bio! She just used her latest few Facebook photos (which Tinder automatically suggests) and within minutes she was already engaging in conversation!
I hadn’t even gotten as far as swiping yet!
How was she already texting people? I had neither swiped left nor right yet! She was skipping so many crucial steps! What about going through everyone’s photos? Reading their bios? Contemplating compatibility? Imagining your future together? How were these things not keeping her back?
Laying in bed, my mind kept racing as I asked myself: Who am I? What do I like? Am I really the person portrayed in the pictures? How do other people see me? How do I see myself? Am I really as cool as I’m trying to appear here? Impostor syndrome! What am I actually looking for? What type of person do I hope to meet?
I didn’t even notice when she got up in the middle of the night to receive a visitor.
It’s all over-thinking at this point.
I woke up the next morning with her telling me that she had hit it off with someone the previous night and he had come to visit. Thinking it was probably not the most responsible thing to invite a stranger to someone else’s house, I couldn’t help but being impressed.
Had I been overthinking this entire process? I decided to give her approach a try and create a very basic profile.
I wasn’t quite happy with my latest Facebook photos though, so I allowed myself some time to browse for a few that I thought represented me better…
As I was about to start swiping, my profile seemed a little bit dull and I figured I should just write a short something as an introduction.
Just give me a moment to think about this for a while…